Modesty At Its Finest

To say I grew up in a conservative home would be an understatement. My dad was, and is strict. Rules of modesty were strictly adhered to, not that I had a body that I would want to flaunt. I was round as a kid....really really round. Honestly, almost a sphere. That is beside the point, shoulders and knees were rarely seen inside the house, let alone outside.

Anyway, in my less round days, around the age of twenty, I bought this great dress. I still own and wear this dress some *cough* seven years later. It is a stretchy black material with a burgundy floral chiffon overlay. It was very in circa 2001. It have a high neckline, to the collarbone. It is ankle length. Its major drawback? It is sleeveless and has a deep-V back almost to the bra line. Not a problem for this little Mormon girl. I simple bought a cute black ribbed cardigan to go over it. I don't like my arms anyway, so I am NEVER tempted to take off the sweater....well almost never.

I was living at home with my parents in between semesters one summer. They had just moved to eastern Washington state, and the change in climate was more than I could handle. It was something like 5,000 degrees outside this particular day. Okay really it was about 107 degrees, but I grew up in Wyoming where you were shouting summer's praises when it his 60. Anyway, we got home from church and I was just roasting in aforementioned dress. I went into my room and innocently took off my little cardigan. I figured it wouldn't be a big deal, it was just my parents and I at home. I then went out into the kitchen and commenced reading the comics.

Not five minutes later, my dad comes into the kitchen looks at me like I was dressed in a micro mini and plastic knee high boots, and says gruffly, "Kimberly, (he ALWAYS calls me Kimberly, in trouble or not, the only person who does this) could you please go and put some clothes on."

I was annoyed in my as-rebellious-as-I-get post teenage way, and grudgingly agreed. On the way back to my bedroom, I got this great idea. I put my sweater back on and then, to show my dad how ridiculous he was being, I took my bath towel wrapped it over my head and across my face so only my eyes were peeking out. Now anyone who knows my dad, knows that this was not a wise choice. He is not a man to be mocked. Nonetheless, I strode back down the hall, giggling all the way. When I got to the kitchen I said, "Is THIS covered enough for you Dad?" The look in his eyes wasn't the friendliest look I've ever seen, luckily, my mom found me absolutely hilarious. She burst out laughing, which made me laugh even harder.

My memory of what happened next is vague, I believe the story ends with my Dad leaving the kitchen muttering something about being glad that there were only 3 weeks of summer left.